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  • Sex on the massage table

    09.11.2017

    Most massage therapists are professionals and won't just stare at your hard-on. Now how is that for a happy ending? Masturbate Before Your Appointment Just so no one is confused: And perhaps, if you are an established regular with your therapist, hugs might be acceptable. This is especially true if you are erect, as this will send me over the edge and I will cut our session short. Listen, to be real, clients do ejaculate during appointments and these are the incidents a therapist retraces in his or her mind over and over for eternity. So to all the guys out there: You don't need to be embarrassed.

    Sex on the massage table


    Who knows how it might end? And this probably goes without saying: Sorry, after five years of happy ending "jokes," I had to. To be clear, my intention is not to boner-shame anyone. In such cases, I'm totally disgusted and will likely give you a less-than-average-level massage, just so you don't get the wrong idea. Masturbate Before Your Appointment Just so no one is confused: This is especially true if you are erect, as this will send me over the edge and I will cut our session short. Let me break it down for you Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. But let me just say that boners during massage appointments are totally normal. And while everyone thinks these jokes are hilarious, the reality is that every massage therapist does have to deal with a few sexually There is no need to dart out of the room. We really don't want you to feel any more uncomfortable than you already are. You are fooling no one. I know exactly what you're up to -- and I'm not going to do it. Everyone at the front desk will look at you like a creep as you weasel your way out the front door. How might I know this? Do you think my hand is going to magically start tugging on Little Tommy because you are inviting me to massage around where he hangs out? Most massage therapists are professionals and won't just stare at your hard-on. Because you have ever-so-unkindly removed the blanket that was purposefully placed on top of you to make certain I am aware of your arousal. You know what I'm thinking during this game of show and tell? And perhaps, if you are an established regular with your therapist, hugs might be acceptable. Now how is that for a happy ending? That I want to end the service immediately -- and I totally would if I could! I am just educating the misinformed who think "happy endings" are a real thing -- as 99 percent of the time, this is not the case. Humping or "purposeful wiggling" -- however you want to term it -- is a sexual act that is awkward and disarming.

    Sex on the massage table

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